Yesterday I was a big, fat, emotional mess. I broke down in tears a few times at work (its times like this that make me happy I have my own office), felt miserable and was just, for lack of a better word, pretty blue.
Since I’m not a hugely emotional person and I was nowhere near premenstrual, I have no idea what was causing the emotional outburst. Personally, I think it’s because my whole lifestyle has changed. I’m not eating. I’m not drinking. I’m not going to bars and restaurants with my friends. I’m at the gym all the time. It sucks. Food used to be my outlet. I knew that I could sit down with a big bowl of pasta or a slice of pizza or a pint of Ben & Jerry’s and immediately feel comforted and happy. I know that statement is so wrong and unhealthy, but hey, that was my life up until a month ago. Now that I’m not eating the pizza, pasta and ice cream I’m not sure how to cope with my feelings.
It didn’t help matters when I had to go do my training session with Rob. Poor guy had to think I’m a hot mess because I started bawling right before we got to work. I’m talking wiping my eyes on my sleeves, sniffling, disgusting crying. After confirming that I’m not premenstrual, Rob was like, ‘Suck it up and lets get to work.’ There ain’t no rest for the wicked, I suppose.
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